Wanted: Toddler's Personal Assistant - Stephanie Kiser

Stephanie Kiser’s memoir on her time as a nanny for the New York elite was one of those rare books I couldn't put down. As she takes on this high paying job to survive as a writer despite heavy student loan debt in Manhattan, she transports us into the extravagant lives of the privileged few, to their Upper East Side residences with their designer baby wardrobes, their estates in the Hamptons too large to take in, and then some.

It's a dream come true for her, at first, as she takes us on her journey of assisting several such families with their childcare needs. Her bosses, the mothers and fathers of these babies in need, range from honest and grounded to peculiar and downright abusive, all in the quest to provide the most curated experience for their child.

I think what makes this book stand out so much is how she weaves in her own upbringing in poverty and brings it in contrast with the lavish life her little Upper East Side brethren experience.

At one point, Kiser even worries about the arrival of a new baby in the family she's taking care of, comparing it to the serious financial hardship that situation caused in her own family.

“I know the sort of damage new additions can bring to a family, and I am terrified for Sasha. The one thing I cannot understand when she tells me this is why she looks so incredibly happy.”

Kiser also masters a discussion on several social issues—for one she describes the inequality that exists between women and men even in the upper crust of our economy, with all the help that can be bought by their wealth.

“The fact was, Americans supported working wives, so long as the women still did all the things they’d done when they didn’t work. By the time I was an adult on the Upper East Side, I’d find that the evidence spoke for itself. Women in America were fucked. Poor, minority, and uneducated women in America were doubly fucked.”

She also manages to use her multifaceted book to comment on her own privilege as a white American citizen in the profession, comparing her relative safety to the cutthroat immigrant labor practices during COVID that result in sudden job loss and even the need to leave the country in some cases.

The glitzy armor begins to gnaw even on her “safer” existence though. Contrary to the expected trope, it isn't the abusive environment that wears her down though—in fact, she seems to have a spidey sense for exploitative situations to step away from. Instead, it is the loss of her writing career, the reason for her student loans in the first place, that begins to unsettle her.

The book culminates in the examination of American economy and politics and how they've led her on her path from poverty to a college degree and debt. Kiser concludes on a positive note and leaves us in awe of not only her courage, but also her exemplary writing, which didn't fall by the wayside throughout her years as a nanny after all.

“Life in America was rigged, but I had done well enough in the game to find a happy medium. My feet were firmly planted on the bridge between less and more. It was everything I could have hoped for.”

Thank you Sourcebooks and Netgalley for the Advance Reader's Copy in exchange for an honest review.